Small mysteries

Does anyone else wake up with sore ears? I sleep on my side and regularly wake up with red crumpled ears where they’ve got all folded up between my head and the pillow. I scrutinised them this morning in the bathroom mirror, I’ve always thought they’re a weird shape and they don’t match but they don’t appear to be abnormally large and floppy… 

I recently discovered my site stat page and I’m alarmed and amused by these search parameters that have landed up on my blog. I’ve picked my favourite oddities;

yummy milk tea cart,   i’m so tired of spots, can jerking off with a banana hurt you, british telecom work fit 2011, despotic, “i am not a turnip”, sleep deprivation seeing spots, lump of meat, ust because you know someone doesn’t mean you love them, and just because you don’t know people doesn’t mean you can’t love them. you can fall in love with a complete stranger in a heartbeat, if god planned that route for you. so open your heart to strangers more photo,

I hope my plantain and jerk chicken recipe was a welcome diversion from some anguished, (I see her as a solitary mixed up emo girl), post ecstasy remorse. I hope the tired and seeing spots searcher checked out NHS online after perusing my chickenpox woes. Dear “lump of meat” I hope you found what you were looking for and I kind of hope it was elsewhere. Last one, seems very specific – and how did you land up here? Thor bless google, that’s what I say. (well, todays the first time, I like it though.)

60 minute makeover, why would you be pleased to come home to find your house turned into a bordello by a team of decorating monkeys? Why do I keep watching it? Like a knitting crone at a guillotine. (Karen – this is a british daytime TV show where they redecorate three rooms in sixty minutes. Usually there’s a chandelier, some statement wall paper and a lot of mirrored furniture.)

When I spellcheck it tells me I’m writing in the passive voice a lot. I read through and don’t know how to change it. I wonder gloomily if ABChas been talking to my therapist.

When will I have enough hairslides and bands? I buy some more every week. I know there’s some natural toddler hurling wastage but still. I think I must have borrowers. Or really fashion conscious mice.

Alan Titchmarsh, and why is Lauren Laverne qualified to present the culture show?

Small mysteries but still they occupy a part of my mind as I move through the daily routines. Todays BT is watching Ida play in the garden, she doesn’t know I’m watching her and I’m struck anew with wonder at the fact of her as a small independent person with a head full of her own thoughts.


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